Life

So, life has a funny way of changing so much;
and in such a short space of time.

It makes me start to question things,
re-evaluate things,
look at things from a new perspective.

On Saturday, one of my besties,
and the only actual friend I have living in town,
told me she's leaving town,
that she was handing in her resignation.

It makes sense, and it's the best thing for her.
Really, it is.
She's been so miserable at work for ages, and it's taking it's toll on her.
On everything she says, does, thinks.
It's definitely the right thing for her.

But, it devastated me a little.

She has only been here for 5 years but that 5 years feels like a lifetime

I'm not really sure what I'm going to do without her,
she's the one I call on a regular basis,
for any reason at all.

She's the one I fangirl over The Hobbit, and Sherlock,
and numerous other things with.

She's the one who's place I randomly show up to,
or her at mine,
for no reason at all,
and it ends hours later with great conversations, dinner, and movies

She's the one I go and see movies with.

She's the one I tell everything to.

I really don't know what I'm going to do without her.

Sure, she's still a phone call away,
but she's also 8 hours drive
(on a good day),
so I can't really just decide, spur of the moment, that I want/need to see her.

It's gonna suck, but it's what's best for her.

She wrote out her resignation letter at my place on Sunday night.
She handed it in yesterday.

It's all very real now.

It made me start to question a few things.

Then on Sunday night my aunt died

I wasn't really sure how to feel, actually, I'm still not

She has been very sick for a long time
2 years suffering from cancer.

By the end she barely ate
and all she did was sleep

I felt bad when my first feeling was of relief, and not a lot of surprise.

She's no longer suffering, she's not in pain.

But at the same time, a wonderful, kind, spirited lady is no longer with us.

One of the few aunt's on my dad's side (she married my dad's brother)
who actually was interested in what my sister and I did
She didn't ask us when we were getting married
or when we're having kids like so many others do

She was interested in us, and what we wanted to do.

Her funeral is Friday.
She is being cremated

She would have had everything planned out, down to the last flower and song

She was just that sort of person
She wouldn't have wanted her husband, kids, grandkids, and great grandkids
(She was my aunt, but only a year younger than my Gran, they went to school together)
to have to organise that on top of their grief

That;s just who she was

All this change and upheaval has made me start to re-evaluate things

Big things and small things

Goals and wants and dreams

It has made me even more certain that physiology is what I want to do,
and that I want to work with the kids in a hospital like Westmead, or Randwick Children's Hospitals

It has made me more certain that I want a partner (ideally a husband), and children
I want a house filled with family and friends and laughter and love

But at the same time, it has made me more certain that I need to travel again,
That I shouldn't put off my trip to the UK any further
That, no matter what my mother says about finishing uni first,
I should put it off for a few years and go

Before husbands and kids come around

Uni will still be there when I get back
It's really not going anywhere

When my mum says 'wait' all I can think about is Barry doing Canada and the Rockies alone
Barry and Barbara had been talking about it for years
They were planning on going next year
Now he will go on his own, if he goes at all

I don't want to do that

I don't want to put off what I want to do, and can do, now, for later

A later that might never come.

My grandfather (my mum's dad), died when he was 62.
My Gran was a widow at 50.
My mum is 54, my dad 59 this year

It puts things into perspective

About ages, and being 'old' and how out views change as we get older

I loved doing Contiki through the USA a few years ago,
getting up early and going to bed late,
hauling my luggage up the stairs of our motels
(my roommate and I got every top floor whenever we stayed somewhere that didn't have an elevator)
running about to be places on time,
exploring new places with new friends
or on my own,
without a map, or any idea where I was going

I loved Vancouver when I lived there for 6 months nearly 3 years ago

Again, on my own
with no-one I knew,
and no idea what I was doing or where I was going.

I look at my parents doing a Topdeck tour through Europe a few months before I left for Canada

My dad was over hauling suitcases and travelling everyday by the end of it
My mum was over traipsing up and down stairs all the time
They needed the week they spent in Ireland, hiring a car and doing it at their own pace
they needed the week spent in Greece at the end of it all to unwind and relax

I don't want to be that age and struggling to do Europe,
being so exhausted at the end

I want to LIVE in the UK
Or Ireland, I'm not picky

I don't want to just holiday

Australia is so far away from everything else,
I need to make the most of whatever time I have to spend in these far off places.

A friend of mine (Canadian) asked if she could visit me when I move.
Of course she can
She said 'It's only a 6 hour flight from Toronto to London'

I'm pretty sure it's a 6 hour flight from Sydney to Perth

It's 3 hours to New Zealand

It's 9 hours to Japan

16 hours to the West Coast of the States/Canada

It's 24+ hours (depending on stop over length) to get to London

I want to stay for as long as I can. It's not like it's a simple trip to hop back over there to see something I didn't get to see before.

Morag's move, and Barbara's death have just solidified the knowledge that there is nothing in my hometown for me anymore

My school friends have all left or moved on, or we are no longer friends,
even if we still say hello to each other when we see each other

My family are all in various stages of moving

My sister bought a house last year with her partner and will be moving into it,
in another town (our uni town) in July, to be with him rather than long distance

My parents put their house on the market,
within a week there was an offer on it (just waiting to see if they get finance)
They will rent somewhere in town for 6 months,
and apply for jobs in and around Newcastle
They have a house down there that they are renting out to someone
They will move as soon as they get jobs

There will be nothing in this town for me by the end of the year most likely

Even my good friends at work are leaving me

Carlyn is going back home to Canada with her Aussie fiance,
and Josh is going with them

I have to do this for me, not for anyone else.

Time is too short,

and life is too precious

So, decide what you want to do,
what is important to you,
what you will regret not doing on your deathbed

Then go and do it

Life is too short to do what others want you to do at the expense of what you want

Dance, sing, laugh, travel, learn, experience, cry, believe and live

That is all you can do.

I'm in love!!!

With a washing machine.

MY washing machine to be precise.

That is how happy I am to finally have one.

I'm sure you're all thinking I've lost the plot somewhere,

that maybe the heat has gone to my head (it is likely),

or I'm dehydrated (a very distinct possibility in this immense heat) and hallucinating

But I assure you I'm not.

I finally got a washing machine on Sunday (I may have done a little happy dance when mum called to tell me they were bringing it in, 

even though I groaned at the thought of getting up before 9am on a Sunday I didn't have to work)

Sunday before last I was heading into pole dancing practice and went via mum and dads to drop off work clothes so they could be washed

Enter unexpected meeting with an aunt and uncle (dad's older sister), while I'm there in my gym tan top and pole shorts (which are very short).

My aunt asked if I needed a washing machine, and that my cousin happened to be getting a new one on Saturday, and if I wanted it I could have his old one.

Yay for free stuff.

I said yes enthusiastically before I practically ran out the door

(I was running late)

And I finally have it

*cue more happy dancing around my house

Seriously guys, you have no idea how happy this piece of machinery makes me.

I moved into my place the 17th of December. 

It's now the 17th of Feb.

It has been 2 MONTHS of running backwards and forwards to my parents place (15km each way) just to wash my clothes, and sheets and towels.

And being that we are only given one set of work clothes, that makes a lot of running into town just to wash a shirt and pair of pants

and anything else that I had lying around to make an even semi decent sort of load

I am so very happy to have a washing machine now. 

It means I can wash my work clothes when I get home from work and they will dry before I go to work the next day.

I can wash my sheets and towels without dragging them all over town

I can wash my clothes and underwear without being worried that I'll drop my knickers somewhere between my house and my car!!!

I am sure in a few weeks this awesomeness will wear off, but for now I will bask in the awesomeness of modern technology finally being in my house

Oh, and did I mention that my uncle is Hungarian?

And even though we are family, I am not entitled to any kind of entitlements?

He is and I'm not. Which really sucks.

No European passport. No easier access to visas. Nothing

All because he is an uncle rather than a direct relative!

His European citizenship is lost on his sons.

Not so much on his daughters, but neither of his sons want to travel.

I would be quite happy to take their ability to get a European passport, but that is not allowed.

Stupid laws.

Maybe one day he could take me and show me around Hungary. 

Especially because I have no idea where to go, what I'm doing, and I don't speak the language.

I'm not sure if his kids do either. I'm sure he does, even if he's been out here for many, many, many years. 

Like, he and my aunt had their 50th wedding anniversary a few years ago.

(My dad is the second youngest of 12, hence the massive age and timeline gaps between the siblings.)

Australia Day Weekend Fun!!!

And some not so fun, but we'll get there.

So, the other day I got a call from Nat coz she had to cancel our dinner date because she had a co-worker's farewell to attend.

I understood, I did, really, but I was very disappointed.

I really wanted a chance to catch up with her, and o get everything about my dad off my chest to someone who wasn't involved in it.

But no worries, I got a message Friday night asking how I felt about a road trip to Sydney and a girls day. 

I said no way.

Kidding.

I said hell yeah!!!

So, Saturday afternoon, I packed my bags (after getting the day off work, and being told dad was coming home which is a whole other post entirely), and headed the 1.5 hours south to see one of my bestest ever friends. 

I mean, this was the girl who called me at 9am on a Saturday morning, when I was so hungover I seriously thought I would die, told me to get my arse in the shower, that she needed groceries, and I was going with her.

She banged on my bathroom door for about 5 minutes before I could make myself leave the warm confines of the shower stall that day.

Then proceeded to give me shit about it ever after. She still does.

Anyway...

I get there and am handed my bridesmaid dress and my wedding invitation (I had made a joke about not being invited because everyone already had there's and were sending them back and I hadn't even gotten one)

It's stunning.

See here:

Ans it's the blue in the picture and looks exactly the same.

They made them all to order, so we each got our dress in exactly our size.

And yes, I am trying to lose weight, but it laces up the back so as long as I don't lose 20 kg in the next 10 or so weeks, it'll still fit!

Nat was hesitant as none of us had bought made to order dresses, but they're perfect. I'm thinking I may cut the length of mine to my knees afterwards because you could definitely wear it shorter and it would still look amazing.

Fro Yo we had for dessert on Friday night

Anyway...

Sunday morning, bright and early we pack the car and hit the road. 

Part way there we remembered that, while we bought the snorkeling gear with us, we forgot the umbrella and hats. Oops.

So, We pick up Amy, then meander through the city to Wollongong where we pick up Boe, before heading down the South Coast. 

We ended up at Shellharbour. More specifically, Bushrangers Bay.

Yes, the rocks go right into the water. Makes it hard to get in and even harder to get out.

All images via Google.

It's an absolutely breathtaking place, and I wish I had my photos, but they were taken with Nat's phone.

It was here, on this pebbly beach, that we waddled into the water, laughing at each other as we tried not to fall over as we navigated the rocks in our flippers, and snorkeled in the wonderfully warm water for about an hour.

Too bad the water was a bit murky and we couldn't see very far.

The group of diver's getting their certificates made me want to join them.

After we all paddled (and I had a slight moment of panic when I felt like I couldn't breathe, as I always do when I first start to snorkel or dive after no having done it for a while), we sat on the warm rocks (using our towels as padding), and soaked up the glorious sun.

Then we headed for an actual beach, back up in Shellharbour.

Ah, the beach. Really nothing like it, and I really haven't seen any place (that's not a small island ala Fiji etc) that has beaches like ours. With kilometers of sand stretching out in both directions, the clear water, the atmosphere. 

To be honest, even when I was in the USA I found myself missing Australia's beaches.

This time I didn't get in the water.

Nat and I lazed around, soaking in the sun, and making pictures out of the clouds like we were 5 again.

Ok, so we did splash our feet in the waves, running in and out like crazy people and trying to splash each other like we were kids, but it was fun. All this while Amy and Boe bobbed about in the water.

It was a great day, and I had so much fun.

It was just what I needed. A day of fun, sun, water and my girlies.

All was good until we had dinner.

KFC

I ate it and within minutes was so hugely bloated it was difficult to take in a deep breath because my skin wouldn't stretch anymore.

I was so glad when we got to Boe's place and I could use her bathroom.

I felt better.

We dropped Amy off a home, and I took over the driving.

I felt ok. I had the window wound down so I could get some air but I was ok.

We were 20 minutes from Nat's place, still on the freeway, when I turned to her and said "We need to stop, I'm going to be sick".

I hit the breaks, hard (because I drive a manual and she drives and auto and I was reflexively looking for a clutch), put a hand over my mouth and a hand on the door.

Too late.

I was sick in her car.

I felt terrible about it later, after I'd got out of the car and was throwing up over the railing at the side of the road, while Nat cleaned up. (she said it was good practice for when the kids come along).

I took my dress off, used the clean part to wipe the grease (I could see it on my leg in the weak light from the car), and was forever grateful that I was still in my bikini, and not running around in my underwear.

Although, from the honks, and hollers we got from passing cars, I don't think they could tell the difference.

We made it home, and I spent the next 45 minutes curled around the toilet. 

I showered, then headed to bed.

And proceeded to get up about every 10-20 minutes, 30-40 if I was lucky, to throw up, or other things.

Even if I had nothing left to throw up, my body wouldn't stop.

I think it was trying to remove my organs my 3am.

Even water wouldn't stay down.

I finally dragged myself back to bed, carrying a bucket, and curled up, my clean beach towel under my head and seriously contemplated having to call my parents in the morning to come and get me because I didn't think I would be able to actually drive home.

Food poisoning...

I don't recommend it.

It took me 3 days to get over.

Thursday morning was the first morning I woke up without wondering if I would feel the need to vomit that day. I think the no work, and being able to sleep in helped immensely.

Thank god for amazing friends.

I put money in her bank account for car cleaning when I put the rest of the money for hair and make up in.

She wasn't happy, because she had told me not to...

That her car needed a clean anyway...

I didn't listen.

It alleviated my guilt just a little.

Needless to say I won't be eating KFC again.

Such a horrible way to end such an amazing weekend.

But. more good things to come :D

Random Happenings...

Am I the only only person who gets so involved with things that they're actually surprised when they look up and it's dark?

Yes? 

No?

It has happened to me numerous times, in many places for many, many, many different reasons.

Ok, so reading may be involved most of the time, but sometimes it's a book, sometimes it's the laptop. 

I have actually been so engrossed in a book that I nearly jumped out of my skin when my mum turned on the light behind the couch I was reading on.

In all honesty, she was surprised I could still make out the words.

So was I when I realised that the room was so very, very dark before she turned on the light.

One of those moments where you don't realise the exact situation until it changes.

Tonight, I was sitting at my kitchen table, going through the photos on my new camera (I am obsessed with it, and so very very in love), that I was honestly surprised when I looked up and realised my house was nearly pitch black.

My camera: A Nikon 3300. Would love another lens to go with it.

When I noticed the time was 8.45pm, I figured it was supposed to be dark.

Especially when all my blinds were shut to keep the heat out.

33 degrees C at 5.30 pm!!!

But the days are getting shorter as we churn through the last month of summer and head towards autumn. (For those of you who don't know, the Aussie seasons change at the start of the month, rather than with the equinoxes like in most places. Something to do with when the English settled here and realised that it was nearing 40 degrees and it hadn't even hit the official summer yet)

And autumn brings weddings (2), and birthdays (Dad's next month, mine and mum's in May), and warm clothes, and leaves changing colours, and cooler temperatures which mean I can sleep through the night.

Anyway...

I was going through my photos, and the photography book my mum bought me for Christmas, and realised that, while I'm not amazing behind the camera, I'm not as terrible as I thought I might be.

And I'm trying out the 'homework' in each chapter of the book, just trying to find something new to photograph, or something old to take photo's of in a new way.

Random rocks near the drain in the house I was living in, random cat that adopted us (me in particular, he used to sleep on my windowsill) for about 6 weeks.

Nat and I spent a day at Newcastle Beach a few weeks ago and we had an absolute blast. We didn't get in the water because it was more a spur of the moment decision and neither of us were wearing anything remotely resembling swimmers.



Have you seen a sky as blue as this? I've been to lots of places, including through the Asian Pacific and I am still amazed at the blue of our summer sky's. We were very adult like and bought an umbrella to go with our picnic blanket, and we even bought our own picnic! Very adult like. We smothered ourselves in sunscreen, laid in the shade (we still laid in the sun and got a bit of a tan), we snacked on the food we bought ourselves rather than go looking for food at the beach (although the fish and chip shop smelled AMAZING!!!), and we chatted about anything and everything. I love days like that.

The lily's I bought myself. Who says someone needs to buy them for you? Buy them for yourself I say!

How gorgeous is my grandmother's dog?! She's beautiful, in look and in temperament. She's a Maltese Shitzu cross. And she's happy to entertain herself, wandering Gran's massive backyard, or playing with the insane amount of toys she has (she doesn't do squeaky things though). Although she is very much a people dog who loves cuddles, and belly rubs.

The massive gum tree my sister, cousins and I used to climb as kids. Keep in mind that's a 6 foot fence behind it, just to give you an idea of how big it is.

The mountains that are behind my grandmother's house. There's only one or two streets between her house and the base of the mountain. And see? Massive gum tree. That's the top of the shed roof you can see, and that's not even the top of the tree. And the base of the shed sits higher than the base of the tree because the shed is on a slight hill.

My old housemates puppy Rosie. She's a Golden Labrador, and so beautiful. These were taken the Tuesday after she came home (Megan picked her up on the Sunday). She was content to roam the backyard, and snooze with her toys, but she liked being around people (me that day as I was the only one home). However, she liked to bite.

Beautiful souvenirs my mum and dad bought back from Vietnam when they went last year. I love my little Buddha's and my lotus flower tea light holder.

I am so in love with my camera.

Now I just need to use it more and take more photos with it :D

Well, hi there

So, I planned to take a social media time out. Which I did...

Clearly.

But, I never planned to take this long off. A whole year and a bit...

Oops.

Oh well.

The time out was good for me. For a while there I started obsessing about what everyone else was doing, then I started asking questions, then it just made me miserable.

You know, when everyone you went to school/uni with are settling down, having families, and just getting their lives sorted?

I started asking why that wasn't happening with me. Where did I go wrong? What was so bad about me that it just wasn't happening to me?

But then, when I took Facebook away, and stepped away from Tumblr, and blogs etc, I realised that while I want that, eventually, I don't want that right now. 

I mean sure, if Mr. Right happened to walk in the door (or Mr, Right Now, I'm not picky, I've been single for many, many years) I wouldn't say no, but there are many many things I want to do before babies, and mortgages. You know? Like travel to Europe and the UK, and do things, and meet people and have fun. Not have to worry about what everyone else wants to do.

It made me feel good and kind of re-centered me again.

So, you know how you have some good years and some bad years? And then you have those years that are kinda good, and kinda bad?

I had the last one.

Although, it was more like the beginning and the end were good, the middle... not so much.

Let me recap the highlights and the lowlights for you:

January: A month of highlights:

• I was offered the job of personal trainer for a gym I was a member of. Literally, mum was having a walk through, thinking of joining, and the woman who was leading her around knew me, and asked if I wanted to be a personal trainer at the gym. I said yes, put in my resume (which was really just a formality), and got the job, plus 15 hours a week in reception as well, so I got to quit my job at the pub.

• I also sat an interview in Sydney for a job in a call center. Not what I want to do, but stable hours, and a stable income, which I haven't ever really had. This job offer should have been a sign.

• I also moved out of mum and dad's house (hopefully for the last time), and in with a friend of mine. It was amazing!!! No parents asking 'where are you going?', 'who are you going with?', 'when will you be home?' type questions. Surely I'm not the only one who has parents that treat you like a child again when you're living under their roof? Right?

February: A bit of an everything month:

• I was settling into my new job and loving it. I had many clients, and was really busy. I absolutely loved it. We started an 8 week challenge, and my clients were doing really well.

• However, I started my new year of uni, and while I really enjoyed my exercise science class (possibly because a lot of it was recap from the year before), my anatomy class moved too fast with too much information. (So many people complained about the info overload, and the issues we had with getting the lectures etc that we were all given special consideration for our exam which gave us an automatic 5 marks on top of our exam mark).

• Was still loving living at home

March: Nothing worth mentioning.

April: Lows, Many, many lows

• We finished our 8 week challenge to find many miners (I live in a coal mining town) were losing, or going to lose their jobs, so my PT work went downhill really fast. I was getting maybe 4-5 clients a week at most.

• One of my high school 'enemies' (we weren't really enemies, she disliked me, I hated her back, but I pretty much ignored her while she went out of her way to make me miserable), had a public go at me on her facebook page. While she never mentioned me by name she did put 'the personal trainer at insert workplace name' and made mention of what I was eating (which was wrong). When someone made mention that maybe I didn't eat like that all the time, she told them that I was very overweight and unfit. Made for a very miserable me for a few weeks. And yes, I was overweight, and I still am (although I am starting to work on this again), but she didn't need to publicly shame me. And the gym just put up a note around the gym telling people to be courteous to other people. Strike one against my employer.

• Went to res school (where we basically sit in lectures, and do all out practical work. I met up with some great people I met the year before, but felt like I was just so far out of my depth it wasn't funny.

• Lost my hours in reception, because I had too many clients and they didn't want me splitting the shifts. (In hindsight this should have been a sign too).

May: 

• My birthday!!!! I specifically took this day off, and had a spa day. I also had a session with a psychic (a friend of my then housemate) which is a whole other post on it's own.

June: highs!!!

• I managed to pass my exams!!! Pass for anatomy (which I thought I would fail), and credit for exercise science!!! Yay!!! happy dance was done round and round my house.

July: lows!!! lows, lows, lows.

• I was fired from my job. Basically I had only a few clients at that point in time, and the owner told me that I wasn't spending enough time there, blamed uni etc, when really the town was making no money, laying off workers left right and center, and no one had any spare money to pay a personal trainer (many people interested in PT told me that they just couldn't afford the rates and would I hold sessions outside the gym for cash in hand cheaper). Told me that if I ever wanted to come back if I tool a break from uni, or if I needed to do my prac work there, I was more than welcome to come back, Ah, no thanks. Every time I offered to do something to help get more clients it was turned down. They wanted me to start doing things for free (I already was), and they don't have the right people for me to do my training under.

• On the plus side, my few clients were sad to see me go, and I actually had one lady who demanded a refund because she had paid to have me train her and I was no longer going to be there.

August - September:

• Nothing much. Res school (again) but this time I felt a lot better about it all.

• Finally got myself back into the gym.

• Started to get down about not being able to find work.

October: highs!!!

• Finally got a job. It's only in fast food, but at least it's an income.

• Met some good people at work.

• Uni results are in!!! Credit for anatomy (a huge improvement over the first semester and only a few marks off a distinction), and a distinction for human bioscience (a few marks of a high distinction). Cue the celebrations.

November: Meh

• Decide to study over the summer to get one more unit over and done with.

• Decide to move out on my own. Started to look for a few places.

December: Highs!!!

• My little sister and her partner bought a house. (They bought it about a month before, but it settled in December).

• I got rejected for a few rental places, but then finally got a little villa type thing in the next town over. Plenty of space for me and only $90 a week more than I was paying before. I finally had my own space. Moved in the week before Christmas (the 17th)!!!

• Christmas!!!!!

So, as you can see, a little bit of a rocky year last year. Hopefully this year will be better. At least my uni units look better this year. No more foundation units, we're finally getting into the good stuff. Although I am printing out some of my lecture from last year and putting them in a binder (like my muscle and bone lectures) for future reference, because guaranteed that I'll forget things now that I'm not obsessing over them.

I also managed to catch up with friends a lot more last year, and I'm hoping to continue that even more often this year. I also have 2 girlfriends getting married this year (on the SAME BLOODY DAY!!!) and they're always occasions for get togethers.

I promise it won't take me so long to update again.

Dxo

Personalities

I have always been interested in people. The way they think, what they do, how they act and why they do the tings they do. So, it probably comes as no surprise that, when I went to university, I studied psychology as my major. And I really enjoyed it. It just reinforced my love of learning about humans, and what makes us tick, the idiosyncrasies we all have, and the way things change as we get older.

And, as an extension of this interest in human nature, I have always been fascinated by personality tests, and the like. The funny thing is, I have never really been able to be put into a box. Where you are supposed to have 3 strong personality traits, I have 4. And they're always the opposite of each other. And said traits have very little differences in scores between them.

So, the other day, I found this website and took their personality test. This is what my result came out to be:

When I first saw it I questioned it. Maybe I hadn't read the questions properly. Maybe I miss-marked a few. I mean, it came out that I am Introverted, iNtuitive, Feeling, and Judging. Me? Introverted? Never?

Then I read about the type. And the more I read, the more I was nodding my head, and going 'Oh, that's completely me'. And, by the end, I felt better about myself.

So, here's me, in a nutshell (according to the personality test):

INFJ in a Nutshell

INFJs are creative nurturers with a strong sense of personal integrity and a drive to help others realize their potential. Creative and dedicated, they have a talent for helping others with original solutions to their personal challenges.

The Counselor has a unique ability to intuit others' emotions and motivations, and will often know how someone else is feeling before that person knows it himself. They trust their insights about others and have strong faith in their ability to read people. Although they are sensitive, they are also reserved; the INFJ is a private sort, and is selective about sharing intimate thoughts and feelings.

What Makes the INFJ Tick

INFJs are guided by a deeply considered set of personal values. They are intensely idealistic, and can clearly imagine a happier and more perfect future. They can become discouraged by the harsh realities of the present, but they are typically motivated and persistent in taking positive action nonetheless. The INFJ feels an intrinsic drive to do what they can to make the world a better place.

INFJs want a meaningful life and deep connections with other people. They do not tend to share themselves freely but appreciate emotional intimacy with a select, committed few. Although their rich inner life can sometimes make them seem mysterious or private to others, they profoundly value authentic connections with people they trust.

Recognizing an INFJ

INFJs often appear quiet, caring and sensitive, and may be found listening attentively to someone else’s ideas or concerns. They are highly perceptive about people and want to help others achieve understanding. INFJs are not afraid of complex personal problems; in fact, they are quite complex themselves, and have a rich inner life that few are privy to. They reflect at length on issues of ethics, and feel things deeply. Because Counselors initially appear so gentle and reserved, they may surprise others with their intensity when one of their values is threatened or called into question. Their calm exterior belies the complexity of their inner worlds.

Because INFJs are such complex people, they may be reluctant to engage with others who might not understand or appreciate them, and can thus be hard to get to know. Although they want to get along with others and support them in their goals, they are fiercely loyal to their own system of values and will not follow others down a path that does not feel authentic to them. When they sense that their values are not being respected, or when their intuition tells them that someone’s intentions are not pure, they are likely to withdraw.

INFJ is the rarest type in the population. 

Famous INFJs

Mohandas Gandhi, Eleanor Roosevelt, Emily Bronte, Carl Jung, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Florence Nightingale, Shirley MacLaine, and Jimmy Carter.

Popular Careers for the INFJ

• Translator
• Writer
• Artist
• Musician
• Interior Designer
• Primary School Teacher
• Counselor
• Special Education Teacher
• Physical Therapist
• Occupational Therapist
• Nutritionist
• Psychologist/Psychiatrist
• Social Worker

INFJs as Partners

In relationships, the INFJ is supportive and guided by a sense of integrity. The INFJ's interest in human development applies to their mates as well, and they are encouraging of their partner's dreams, aspirations, and achievements.

INFJs want to maintain harmony in their relationships and are highly motivated to resolve conflicts. They tend to be creative problem-solvers and look for the emotional core of an issue to create a meeting of the minds. Although they desire cooperation, they are not willing to go along with an idea that does not feel authentic to them. When it comes to their core values and ethics, they are unwilling to compromise.

INFJs want a high degree of intimacy and emotional engagement, and are happiest when they feel they are sharing their innermost thoughts and feelings with their mates. INFJs value a partner who respects their deeply held values and ethics, and one who appreciates their creativity and inspiration.

After reading this, I can definitely see myself in this. Job? I thought about being a school teacher, and I like kids. Not teenagers. Kids. When I thought about teaching, it was primary that I thought about doing. I have a keen interest in nutrition, and I thought about going into physiotherapy. I am now studying exercise physiology and want to go into rehabilitation with kids. I am a flute player, and have always been into the arts. So, that is actually quite scary in how accurate it is. 

I am definitely someone who prefers to spend time with a few close friends, or on my own, than with a huge group of people. I talk to people, but very few actually get to know me. I am always searching for a deep, personal connection with people. I am incredibly sentimental, and sometimes overly emotional. I feel I have that strong sense of personal integrity, and definitely a drive to help others. I cannot stand insincere people, and if I feel that someone is not being honest with me, I tend to just leave them alone, making no effort to deal with them. And, I guess, being the rarest type makes sense, because I've always felt a little on the outer, struggling to understand why I don't quite fit with the people and the experiences around me.

I always find these things interesting, and I always find out a little more about me.

Whats your personality type? What about your friends/loved ones? Are you compatible?

D xo