Personalities

I have always been interested in people. The way they think, what they do, how they act and why they do the tings they do. So, it probably comes as no surprise that, when I went to university, I studied psychology as my major. And I really enjoyed it. It just reinforced my love of learning about humans, and what makes us tick, the idiosyncrasies we all have, and the way things change as we get older.

And, as an extension of this interest in human nature, I have always been fascinated by personality tests, and the like. The funny thing is, I have never really been able to be put into a box. Where you are supposed to have 3 strong personality traits, I have 4. And they're always the opposite of each other. And said traits have very little differences in scores between them.

So, the other day, I found this website and took their personality test. This is what my result came out to be:

When I first saw it I questioned it. Maybe I hadn't read the questions properly. Maybe I miss-marked a few. I mean, it came out that I am Introverted, iNtuitive, Feeling, and Judging. Me? Introverted? Never?

Then I read about the type. And the more I read, the more I was nodding my head, and going 'Oh, that's completely me'. And, by the end, I felt better about myself.

So, here's me, in a nutshell (according to the personality test):

INFJ in a Nutshell

INFJs are creative nurturers with a strong sense of personal integrity and a drive to help others realize their potential. Creative and dedicated, they have a talent for helping others with original solutions to their personal challenges.

The Counselor has a unique ability to intuit others' emotions and motivations, and will often know how someone else is feeling before that person knows it himself. They trust their insights about others and have strong faith in their ability to read people. Although they are sensitive, they are also reserved; the INFJ is a private sort, and is selective about sharing intimate thoughts and feelings.

What Makes the INFJ Tick

INFJs are guided by a deeply considered set of personal values. They are intensely idealistic, and can clearly imagine a happier and more perfect future. They can become discouraged by the harsh realities of the present, but they are typically motivated and persistent in taking positive action nonetheless. The INFJ feels an intrinsic drive to do what they can to make the world a better place.

INFJs want a meaningful life and deep connections with other people. They do not tend to share themselves freely but appreciate emotional intimacy with a select, committed few. Although their rich inner life can sometimes make them seem mysterious or private to others, they profoundly value authentic connections with people they trust.

Recognizing an INFJ

INFJs often appear quiet, caring and sensitive, and may be found listening attentively to someone else’s ideas or concerns. They are highly perceptive about people and want to help others achieve understanding. INFJs are not afraid of complex personal problems; in fact, they are quite complex themselves, and have a rich inner life that few are privy to. They reflect at length on issues of ethics, and feel things deeply. Because Counselors initially appear so gentle and reserved, they may surprise others with their intensity when one of their values is threatened or called into question. Their calm exterior belies the complexity of their inner worlds.

Because INFJs are such complex people, they may be reluctant to engage with others who might not understand or appreciate them, and can thus be hard to get to know. Although they want to get along with others and support them in their goals, they are fiercely loyal to their own system of values and will not follow others down a path that does not feel authentic to them. When they sense that their values are not being respected, or when their intuition tells them that someone’s intentions are not pure, they are likely to withdraw.

INFJ is the rarest type in the population. 

Famous INFJs

Mohandas Gandhi, Eleanor Roosevelt, Emily Bronte, Carl Jung, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Florence Nightingale, Shirley MacLaine, and Jimmy Carter.

Popular Careers for the INFJ

• Translator
• Writer
• Artist
• Musician
• Interior Designer
• Primary School Teacher
• Counselor
• Special Education Teacher
• Physical Therapist
• Occupational Therapist
• Nutritionist
• Psychologist/Psychiatrist
• Social Worker

INFJs as Partners

In relationships, the INFJ is supportive and guided by a sense of integrity. The INFJ's interest in human development applies to their mates as well, and they are encouraging of their partner's dreams, aspirations, and achievements.

INFJs want to maintain harmony in their relationships and are highly motivated to resolve conflicts. They tend to be creative problem-solvers and look for the emotional core of an issue to create a meeting of the minds. Although they desire cooperation, they are not willing to go along with an idea that does not feel authentic to them. When it comes to their core values and ethics, they are unwilling to compromise.

INFJs want a high degree of intimacy and emotional engagement, and are happiest when they feel they are sharing their innermost thoughts and feelings with their mates. INFJs value a partner who respects their deeply held values and ethics, and one who appreciates their creativity and inspiration.

After reading this, I can definitely see myself in this. Job? I thought about being a school teacher, and I like kids. Not teenagers. Kids. When I thought about teaching, it was primary that I thought about doing. I have a keen interest in nutrition, and I thought about going into physiotherapy. I am now studying exercise physiology and want to go into rehabilitation with kids. I am a flute player, and have always been into the arts. So, that is actually quite scary in how accurate it is. 

I am definitely someone who prefers to spend time with a few close friends, or on my own, than with a huge group of people. I talk to people, but very few actually get to know me. I am always searching for a deep, personal connection with people. I am incredibly sentimental, and sometimes overly emotional. I feel I have that strong sense of personal integrity, and definitely a drive to help others. I cannot stand insincere people, and if I feel that someone is not being honest with me, I tend to just leave them alone, making no effort to deal with them. And, I guess, being the rarest type makes sense, because I've always felt a little on the outer, struggling to understand why I don't quite fit with the people and the experiences around me.

I always find these things interesting, and I always find out a little more about me.

Whats your personality type? What about your friends/loved ones? Are you compatible?

D xo

I Think I've Found My Calling!!!

Well, maybe. Ok, so I haven't actually worked in a job that I think is my calling, but if the way I've been studying my arse off, and the marks I've been getting in return for it, are any indication, then yes, I have found my calling. And maybe, just maybe, it'll work. And I know there will be hard, incredibly hard, days in the job I want to do. And I know that, because I'm an over-sentimental person, who is way, way, waaaaay too empathetic at times, that it could, and possibly will, rip my heart out at times, and there will be days I will just want to go home and cry, I am so ready for this. And now I'm rambling

I'm sure I said this before, but I'm currently studying a Bachelor of Sports and Exercise Science in Clinical Exercise Physiology. I will, next year, transfer into the new Bachelor of Clinical Exercise Physiology. There are new rule changes and the uni has split the degree into 2 separate ones and there was a lot of jumping up and down from everyone including me, but now that it has all died down, and I've had some time to think about it, the new rules are definitely better (from my perspective anyway). In the current degree there is an awful lot of science subjects. And I know, it's a science degree, but we were studying the biology of cane toads and plants when I'm going to be working with living, breathing humans. I have no need to dissect another cane toad. I don't think I had any reason to in the first place but that is another argument.  We also studied chemistry, which is another good subject, and I'm sure it does end up having a lot to do with what I am studying as well, but I would rather have the unit organised to suit what I'm studying. And I know that sounds selfish, and probably stupid ok, I know it sounds stupid and selfish but when I'm studying a new chapter and idea every week, and I can't see how it relates to me and my studies, I find my attention wavering, and it get's hard to concentrate. If I was doing biochemistry I would have been fine but I'm sure that I'll cover that in later biomechanics classes. And then there was math, and I'm not really sure why I needed to take that class. Maybe it was just to torture us? I didn't like calculus in high school, I hate it even more now. And again, I'm sure it has relevance to other degrees, like engineering etc, but it just didn't feel relevant to me. Yes, I like to know what I'm studying is relevant. I'm someone who learns through doing more than just reading and listening. I was sitting in my biomechanics exam waving my arms and legs around as I tried to work out some of the answers.

Anyway, moving on. SO, the new rules are more prac based (as in, they are less sciency based and more biomechanics based so we aren't spending the first 2 years of our degree saying 'we're studying sports science, why are we looking at plants, and the hardness of diamonds) there's that relevancy thing again, and yes, I know you need the basics to start with, but this course has a 70% drop out rate because the first years don't have enough relevancy to what we want to do at the end. Prime reason for the rule changes

Yay!!! for more relevancy. The downside? It turns into a 5 year degree, and, because I'm doing it mostly part time it's going to take most of my lifetime probably another 6-8 years! downside :(

However, this is definitely something I want to do, something that I can see myself doing for the rest of my life, or at least for a long time :D

Exam results come out (I think) next week, so hopefully the results will show the work I've put in this semester.

But, here's to 2 weeks of time off, and reading things that aren't textbooks :D

Well Hi There...

So, I've been trying for days, weeks really, to figure out how to start this blog. What do I talk about? How do I start it? What should my first post be about? How much do I tell you guys? Do I tell you everything, or should I think about it some before I post everything? Should I just sit here, and let my fingers type whatever they come up with, without censoring it? Should it be a purely positive blog, or should I tell you what's going through my mind at any given point, and at any given mood. Because we all know that no one is happy 100% of every day.

In the end, I didn't come to a conclusion about any of it. But, it's my blog, so really, it should be about me, and what feels right at the time. Shouldn't it? It's supposed to be about me, finding the real me in the mess that is life. Sorting through the chatter that is the rest of the world, and focusing on me and what I want, need and feel.

So, lets get started.

I am in my mid-20's. I have no children, nor do I have a partner. Much to the dismay of my extended family. My parents and grandmother (I only have one grandparent left) don't care as long as my sister and I are happy. My extended family on the other hand? Completely the opposite. The last family reunion (dad's family) we went to, I was continuously asked where my boyfriend was, when I was getting married, when I was having kids. When my reply was I don't have one, not getting married anytime soon because I don't even have said boyfriend, and I'm not having kids until I'm settled and stable, they turned away from me to speak to cousins and 2nd cousins (my dad is one of 12) who have kids/are pregnant/getting married. To them all that counts is getting married and popping out babies. (They all live in small country towns, most of them in the same one). My 2nd cousin who is 2 and a half months older than me just had her 3rd girl. I'm happy for her, I really am. If that's what they want to do, then that's fine. But I feel like, because I don't want to do that, I'm not considered worth talking to. Well, that's been my experience anyway. When questions were asked about what I'm doing/want to do/have plans for, you can see their eyes glaze over when it's 'I'm studying at uni, I've just come home from the USA, I've got a work visa for Canada, I'm finishing a psychology degree'. They just don't seem to care. And my sister and I have learned to live with it. It doesn't mean that it no longer makes us cranky, or feel unworthy because sometimes it does. We've just learned to brush it off, and she and I sit/stand together at these things now (on the rare occasion that we go).

Via Pinterest

Via Pinterest

I'm finally starting to learn this. When I'm around family, or looking at Facebook, or sometimes around some of my friends, I can only think about what they have/are doing etc, and think, 'That's what I should be doing by now', when really, it's not what I want to be doing. When I'm on my own, or with friends who aren't having babies and building houses, I remember that, while I do want that, eventually, there is so much more that I want to do and see and experience before marriage and babies and that part of my life starts. I'm still at university. I'm living with my parents (hopefully not for much longer), I'm still finding me. I'm not ready to have babies. Would I like a partner? Yes. If Mr Right, or Mr Right Now came waltzing in my door at this moment and wanted to start a relationship I would jump at it and take it with both hands.

The life I had planned out as a 17 year old who was finishing high school didn't take into account travel, and friendship problems. It didn't take into account that what I want would change over time. I'm sure I'm not the only one. You know, when you were finishing high school you had this plan for how your life would turn out. I was going to university to study law and psychology. I was going to get amazing marks, and become a very successful criminal lawyer. I was going to make amazing friends and have a university sweetheart. I was going to be married at 26, and starting a family by 28, no later than 30. I was going to own my own apartment (on my own), then rent it out when I got married to my Prince Charming, and we'd have our own apartment in the city. We'd then buy an actual house to raise a family in with dogs and cats.

Ahh, the wisdom of youth. Lets see how this actually turned out:

I went to university to study law and psychology. Met some amazing friends and some not so amazing ones. I had a boyfriend who I adored and who adored me. But, at the end of my third year we broke up after doing long distance for nearly 18 months (we are still very good friends). At the end of my 4th year I worked in the USA over the 3 month summer/Xmas break, and learned to ski and snowboard. I loved it. When I came back I failed (twice) one unit that was compulsory and I was no longer enjoying law. So I put the law degree on hold and just completed my B Arts. That summer I moved to Sydney to study personal training while finishing my Arts degree. I moved home and worked at the same place I'd been working at for 8 years. I was 23 and single.In the May of 2011 I went back to America, this time on a Contiki tour that I had an amazing time on. I met some of the best people I know. I'm still single. Then, 12 months later, June 2012, I moved to Vancouver for 5 months. I loved it. I loved everything about it. The people I met, the friends I made, the city as a whole. I felt like I belonged there. I felt happier there than I have in a while, even though I was on my own and knew no one.When my job hunting showed no results, and my money was running out, I moved back home. I started a new degree in Exercise Physiology, and I think I have finally found my calling. I'm working casually at a pub in town and I hate it. I hate everything about it. I'm 26, still single and desperately job hunting to get out of my parents house, and my somewhat home town. (I have lived her for nearly 17 years, and still feel less at home here than I did in New York or Vancouver).

When I feel like I'm failing at life (is that even possible?) I find myself looking at quotes like the above and reminding myself that just because I'm not doing what everyone else is, it doesn't mean I'm wrong. I don't have to do what everyone else is doing it. I have to do what feels right for me. When I see the disgust on peoples faces when I tell them about my travel, or my aunt (on my mums side) tells me how much she hates flying and she argues with me about overseas travel, I take a deep breath and remind myself that travelling like I do doesn't make me a bum. It makes me someone who is eager to learn about the world, and the people and things in it. It makes me someone who wants to experience everything the world has to offer. I don't want to me living in a tiny town, in a small bubble like most of my extended family. I want to see and do and feel and experience everything. I want to have a life and feel like I've had a life.

Via Pinterest

Via Pinterest

Via Pinterest

I am hoping to move to Sydney after Xmas. That is the plan. I'm applying for jobs at the moment. Reception and medical reception at the moment, but I'll also apply for retail, the gyms and cafes etc. I'd rather a 9-5 Monday-Friday job because, from the time I was 15, I have worked (with the exception of the USA) in jobs that started anywhere from 5am, and finished up to and including 11pm and later. I don't want to work weekends anymore. I don't want to work with food. I don't want to be continually washing my hands (the skin and nails on my hands are terrible, always cracking, splitting, flaking and really really dry). I want to be able to actually have a life and go out to dinner with friends. I want to join a gym and be able to go to the classes. I want to take acting classes, or singing classes, or dance classes and be able to commit to more than 1-2 weeks at a time. I want a stable roster that isn't "this is your roster for the next 2 weeks, but we could change it any time that we need to". I want a job that has to do with the degree I'm studying. I want a job that doesn't involve waitressing, or sales. I don't mind customer service like reception, or banking but I don't want to work for supermarkets.

I know, I know. A lot of 'I don't want this, I don't want that.' I'm trying to focus on what I do want. I wrote a letter to myself from the viewpoint of this time next year, detailing all I want to happen as if it has already happened. I might put bits and pieces of it up in another post. I won't put it all up, and I'll censor some of it. But it was a really good exercise. It made me focus on what I want to have happened between now and then. What I want things to be like. Jobs, partners, houses/apartments, hobbies. So, that's what I'm focusing on at the moment. And whenever I feel like things are overwhelming me, like right now with exams next week, or my parents are harping on about one thing or another, I just take a deep breath and focus on what I want to happen. And, if positive thinking is the trick, I'll get the job, and the apartment, and the life I want. I'll move out of town, make some amazing friends, have a job I enjoy (or at least don't hate), and be able to have a life outside of study and work.

Wish me luck

D